Monday, November 5, 2012

How to Get Over a Heart-Break | Pressing Through My Pain:

Pressing Through MY Pain | You will never be complete until you really understand that you are complete in Jesus. Incompleteness is not the result of being single, but of not being full of God. When two “incomplete” singles get married; their union will not make them complete. You were not created to complete one another but to compliment. Completion is Jesus’ responsibility and complimenting is a woman’s privilege. Being with a man is intended to enhance your happiness; not make you happy. Still this day; I struggle with overcoming a love that I thought would last forever. I gave up all of me just to find happiness with him. I fought through family and friends and defended my chosen love. Smiling all the time on the outside but inside I was screaming for help; I was longing for someone to understand. I wanted them to know him for who he was not for what they saw. There were no limits to what I would do for him. I was happy, beyond happy; I finally had someone I loved that I called mine. Until that one day when my world came tumbling down. The day that he told me; “let’s just take a break”. He told me that he wasn’t the man I needed him to be right now. As he is talking; I was hysterical thinking “how can he do this to me”. I felt like he took my heart right out of my chest and put it in his pocket for safe keeping. I thought how could you try and leave me after everything we have gone through; how could you leave me after I defended you the way I have? I felt like a failure, I felt like I could not even keep the man that I loved so much, what would everybody say? My perfect world had finally slid through my fingertips and there was no way for me to catch it. Now how many of you are struggling to put the pieces back together and that same guy you loved says I would never leave you, turns and walks away? You can spend minutes, hours, and even months, analyzing a situation trying to put the pieces or you can leave the pieces on the floor and move on. If someone walked out your life, let them, do not fight for them to return; if it is ordained by God, no time, no distance, and nobody can interfere with God’s plan. I was once told God never allows you to go through a situation that he didn’t already know you would overcome. A lot of women do not know it but we are stronger than we think. The fire, the storm, and the rain that you go through are just preparing you for something greater. The same man that walked out your life might be the man for you but you guys just met at the wrong time or maybe he was not the one for you so he was a lesson learned. Get on your face before God concerning your situation. It won’t be easy! For my situation, I put my man in the position of God; I had him so far on a pedestal that he reined in my life. And we all know our God is a jealous God, so that is why I feel like God removed him. God may have removed him for a season or we may never be together again but in the meantime I have corrected the error of my ways. I learned how to stop depending on a man to supply my emotions for me. I learned how to not be so dependent on one person and I have learned how to be strong within myself so that I do not lose myself the next time I get into a relationship.
I learned how to put my foot down and keep my standards leveled. I stopped running to everybody to solve my problems and made up my own mind. At this point; I am pursing a modeling career and I am in my last year of college. I am writing a novel and have started my own business. I am also beginning my own women organization. I have chosen to be a role model for girls who do not have that guidance. I have given up sex so that I can present my body as a living sacrifice holy and acceptable to Christ. I do not worry about if he is coming back or not because I have given that to Christ. I cast all my cares on God and he takes them because he cares for me. This is a preparation phase; a phase to prepare me for what is next in my life. I became independent when I stopped worrying about the things I could not fix and I have came to a place where I am happy with myself. I pray this prayer every day, “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference”. I am finding wholeness in Christ and never again in a man. Sometimes it is great to find the good in the goodbye. A woman does not stay in a situation that's continuously causing her hurt; for her to stay there is insanity. Ladies, do not miss out on your best chasing after what could never happen again. I know that wall is up higher than it ever was especially dealing with your first heartbreak but allow God to do the healing and mending and learn to forgive. Forgiveness is not for the other person but it is for you. If it is for you it will work out in your favor and if it is not; I promise you God has something better.

~Te'Aire~

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