The Truth About a Proverbs 31 Woman!

“Who can find a virtuous and capable wife? She is more precious than rubies. Her husband can trust her, and she will greatly enrich his life. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life” (Proverbs 31:10-12) 

Many of you like me have been told or someone eluded to the fact that you need to be a Proverbs 31 woman at some point in your life; be it your parents, preacher, saved family member etc. I don’t know about you but I had no idea that #1 that existed, #2 how to become or act like such a woman and #3 why it was necessary. So if that is you, no need to be ashamed or feel intimidated sista girl. 

As time went on and my relationship with God grew stronger and deeper; he revealed to me the attributes of a Proverbs 31 woman and why it was necessary for every woman to stand in this space rather you are single, married, divorced, widowed etc. I did say every woman right!  I felt it was so important until I wrote a book about it to share with other women. Women who like me once had no idea or those that now do have some understanding but desire to grow even the more. Let me tell you, you will never stop becoming so even if you classify yourself as a Proverbs 31 woman, growth and character building opportunities are always available.

So here is what I want to do, I want to take a few moments to share some characteristics of a Proverbs 31 Women. As you read these, pinpoint where you are so you can take advantage of those growth and character building opportunities:

· She is a women of Faith 

· She Respects and loves her husband 

· She is Honest 

· She is a Good Steward over her Finances 

· She is Nurturing/Motherly 

· She believes in Health and Fitness 

· She is Industrious 

· She is Hospitable 

· She is cognizant in using her Time wisely 

· She displays Beauty 

· She is a woman of Service 

It is my ongoing desire to grow more and more as a Proverbs woman every single day and guess what; I desire the same for you to and for any woman who is ready to say yes.

Each year, a few times a year, we complete the Proverbs 31 Day Challenge corporately. We invite a few thousand women to join us on a 31 Day Challenge that will take them through the book of Proverbs along with my Proverbs Day Devotion that I alluded to earlier. I want so badly for you to join us on this journey and here is why; as a result of you doing this Proverbs 31 Day Challenge, you will gain more Understanding of what a Proverbs 31 Woman looks like; you will become more Wise in your day to day decision making from mate selection, money management, marriage sustainability to your mission and ministry; and you will be more Disciplined in every area of your life. I don’t know about you but I need a little dose of all three.

The Challenge is absolutely FREE to join but in order for you to get the most value and the results you desire from this challenge, you will need to make a small investment of $7.99 to get a copy of the electronic version of the devotional book. If you want to uplevel your experience and am really serious about this journey, we also have an option that includes a start-up tool kit which is a journal so you can reflect on the lesson and write your take-a-ways of what you got from the scripture and lesson each day.  Click HERE to check out  both options and to see which one is best for you.You will only get out what you put in!

Next, I am invite you to join our Proverbs 31 Day Challenge group via Facebook along with 500+ women. You being apart of this group will allow you to walk alongside other woman who desire to become or desire more growth as a Proverbs 31 Woman. This group will provide you support along with regular inspiration and motivation while on your journey. Click HERE to join the group.

I look forward to not only Going with you but Growing with you over the next 31 Days!

Treal Ravenel

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The 10 Commandments to having Great Relationships!!

Many of us have or have had relationship goals at some point of our life. We think of the day when we're going to be able to spend the rest of our life with that special someone and live happily ever after. I know I did and for a long time that was my focus. I would only hope and dream and wonder what the rest of my life would be like with me sharing it with someone I loved so deeply. 

What I fell to realize for a long time is that having a special someone in your life forever, takes a lot of work. And the work does not start when you get into a relationship with the other person. In fact, the work starts with your relationship with God.

I want to take just a few moments of your time to share some tools with you on how you can put in the work so you can have great relationships.

From a small child as long as I can remember, I've always had a relationship or had an understanding of who God was, but I did not always have a close relationship with him to the point of allowing him to lead my life. So in desiring to have a relationship with another person, I had to come to grips that developing a strong and committed relationship with God was first priority. It would set the stage for every other relationship that would come after that.

I had to allow God to be in total control of my life and my daily decisions and I had to also learn how to submit to his will for my life and not my own. I had to learn how to become discipline anf implement self-control and consistency in my relationship toward him.

Now the next part is where the rubber meets the road. And from my own life and from what I've witnessed in the lives of others; this part seems to be the hardest of them all and that is the relationship with yourself. Many of us get to the point where we have the relationship with God down to a science but when it comes to us developing and growing a relationship with ourselves, that is where we sometimes fall by the wayside. Many feel like because they have a strong relationship with God then they automatically have a strong relationship with themdelf but that is so far from the truth. When developing and working on a relationship with yourself, you have HUGE part to play in the process.

You have to be honest with who you are and be able to go to God in complete vulnerability and honesty and asking him to show you you. In your quest to really finding out who you are and in uncovering all of the deepest things about yourself, you have to be ready and willing to put in the work to begin growing, developing and transforming.  The best and most effective thing you can do for the love of your life one day is to constantly become a better version of Who You Are.  Your relationships will only be as good as you so it behooves you to always work diligently in this area.

You have to be open and true and asking God to show your attitudes, your moods; your self-righteous and quirky behavioral patterns. Your past hurt and pain that is still affecting you, the emotional barriers and baggage that you still have, deeply rooted mentally, emotionally and psychological issues that still have you in bondage, the borders and boundaries that you have  put in place to block out other people because of your own internal insecurities and the list goes on. The benefit of you doing this is that you will not carry these things over into your long-term relationship and marriage. This will be more beneficial for you, your partner and your current or future children.

After you've done your spiritual work and your personal growth work then and only then are you ready and able to be in a relationship where you can love someone unconditionally.  Then and only then can you build the foundation of a solid relationship and being able to not only exist together but grow together cohesively, now having a firm and secure foundation.

Hopefully you will be able to take what I said throughout this blog and what I'm about to give you and apply it to your life regardless of your current relationship status. Even those of you that are already married or in a long-term relationship, it's never too late to go back to the root. It's never too late to rebuild the foundation of your spiritual and personal life.

I want to leave with you The Ten Commandments to having Great Relationships:

I. Honor God with your first fruits and with the substance of all thine increase. God gets and keeps the first part of you.

II. Your body is God's temple, treat it as such. Honor God with your body by the decisions you make every single day.

III. Continue contributing and growing your current relationships by applying these things written throughout this blog.

IV. Cleanliness is next to godliness; practice such in your singleness, so you can transfer it into your marriage. And when I talk of cleanliness, I'm not talking only about externally but internal cleanliness; your thoughts behaviors and attitudes.

V. Get rid of selfishness. Willingly share what you have with those who are part of your life.

VI. We serve a God of compassion and as a Kingdom citizen; we should implement that same attribute toward others.

VII. Know, understand and practice the fruit of the spirit Galatians 5 22-23. Implement these into your life and relationships every single day.

VIII. Get rid of fault-finding and practice grace and forgiveness. Forgive because God first forgave you.

IX. Choose to love those in your life the way God loves you and read and meditate on 1 Corinthians 13:1-10.

X. Stay true to yourself. Be honest with who you are and be okay & accept that there is always room to grow.

Bonus: Healed  people help heal others, get healed!

If you implement these things into your life and current relationships, you will begin to see tremendous transformation take place. Remember, the greatest thing you can do for your relationships is to first have a solid relationship with God and then have a solid relationship with yourself. You will be fooling yourself to think that if you don't work on these two areas first, you will have great relationships with others. In fact the opposite is true. 

Love you sis,

Treal Ravenel

P.S. For those of you who are single and you are committed to the growth work process, I want to offer you free gift. This free gift speaks directly to establishing healthy relationship goals and I know that it will support you even the more on your journey of having great relationships.  Grab your free gift HERE.

P.S.S. Be on the lookout for the release of Jill's next book: Sexless Single

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7 Signs He/She Is Mr(s). Right versus Mr(s). Right Now!

 

So someone from our community asked the question, how do you know if a guy is a Mr. Right versus a Mr. Right Now?  So I created this vlog to response to this question.  This may seem obvious to some but for me I settled for a Mr. Right Now on many occasions because I never took the time to define exactly what a Mr. Right look like for me.  When I did, that made it crystal clear.  Within 30 days of doing that, I was able to identify the man God had appointed to my life.  I had met him five (5) weeks prior but once I had the written criteria coupled with verbal and visual indications from him, I could see he was my Mr. Right! There were several attributes that helped me identify him. Here I will share the top seven (7) signs.

Click below to watch the video!  Be sure to subscribe & leave a comment!

No. 1 He/She loves God and submits to God's Word.  That is so important.  It is not an accident this is number one.  Understand we are talking about courtship that leads to marriage and it is a covenant relationship.  In a covenant relationship, you will have to submit to the other person. Often times we focus on the wife having to submit to the husband which is true, but men have to submit to Christ and they have to love their wives as Christ loved the church.

No. 2 His/Her purpose for dating should be to find a wife (or husband for the guys). So listen, if you are not out their asking specifically what is your goal in a dating relationship, you are missing your life!  It is running!!! Go get it! LOL

No, seriously, be sure to write this question down, "What is your goal in a dating relationship at this time"? Put this question in your iPhone, android or where ever.  You should ask this question on date # 1 no later than date # 2.  And be sure you know the answer to this question for yourself.

If you are in high school or college age or younger reading this blog, than you should be having group dates and not getting too serious in a relationship.  Spend this time understanding what you like and what you don't like, trust me on this!

No. 3 He respects your decisions and does not attempt to do or say things that will pull you away from God.  Likewise with her.    I wrote a book called Sexless Single | How to Stay Sexless in a Sex Filled World!  And I wrote this book because so many Believers want to be celibate but they struggle with how to actually live that out each and every day especially when dating and when faced with temptation.

One of the things I find to be true is that you cannot be with a partner who does not respect your decision to be celibate.   If you are with someone who does not respect your decision, he/she will try to pull you in to an intimate or sexual experience.  That is disrespectful!   If you are in a relationship like that or if you are in a relationship with someone who does not have the same goals that you have, get out!  You are not aligned! Or as the  Bible says it, you are unequally yoked!

No. 4 He/she is financially independent.  This means (s)he is not living with his mama. OKAY!  He does not have more money on his back then he has in the bank.  You need to ask questions!

Do you have a 401K? Do you have TSP?  Do you have a Roth IRA?  What percentage are you contributing into that each month?  Are you putting in the minimum match?  How much are you saving per month?  How much is your car note?  Are you renting or buying? How much credit card debt do you have? 

I recall Clefo Dollar had a sermon and he gave some relationship advice and he listed dozens of questions to ask and at the end he said, "You need to know"  and that is exactly what I am telling you right now.  You need to know the answer to these questions to see if you and the person you are dating have similar goals and aspirations.

The reason behind the above questions are because you want to make sure (s)he is financially independent. You do not want to date someone who is living with their mama.  Let me qualify that.  Let's say, he is living with his mother, hold on, I can't qualify that, let's say he has a roommate.

When I met my husband, he had a roommate, he was renting a room.  On the other hand, he had a car, he had a good paying job/ really a career and he choose to have a roommate to save money and because he is frugal if I can just be that honest ;-)  You need to find out why he does not have his own place.  Is it because he can't afford to have his own place or is it because he is paying out of debt and/or saving to buy a house? And a lady likewise.  Again you need to know!

No. 5 He shows compassionate towards your children. She shows compassionate towards your children. Dude, if you have a daughter and she comes over every weekend, your partner has to respect that.  If she does not like it, you already have a conflict, move on!

I am just saying, God wants to give you a million dollar mate, stop wasting your time with these hundred dollar mates and five dollar mates.

No.6 She makes sacrifices on your behalf. Certain things he does not do because you don't approve of it.  Or it may make you upset or it may make you uncomfortable.  That is not coming from a place of control and should not conflict with priorities with your family and your job.  Like you going out with your friends to the club for example. Or on the flip side, it could be that your partner does something for you, to make you happy.

I remember one time, I got upset  with my husband when we were dating because he did not have any pictures of me or us on his Facebook page.  Don't judge me, you know Facebook is serious now-a-days...

So to make me happy he posted a picture of us,  You may say that is petty but it was important to me. To me that was him publicly confessing and professing his love for me and he knew it meant a lot to me so he made that sacrifice for me.

No. 7 He has/ she includes you in their inner circle.  You met the mom, you met the best friend,  you know his people.  If you have been dating him for six months and you don't know his people, HOUSTON, we have a problem.  As you go forth, be sure to applied these dating principles to your life and really just your day to day decisions, pray and ask God to give you wisdom and discerning spirit so you can hear His voice and live your best life now and attract God's best for your life!

If you enjoyed these dating tips and want more Christian relationship advice and dating advice, then be sure to join our email list and join the 7 Day Sexless Single Challenge by click here.

P.S. For the first 100 people, you can pre-order a copy of my book, Sexless Single | How to Stay Sexless in a Sex Filled World by clicking here.  You only have to pay for shipping.
Once the book is released mid November it will be $14.99 plus shipping.

P.S.S. Be sure to join our Facebook group at DMI Kingdom Women Lounge!

My name is Jill Bulluck and I am committed to preparing and positioning Kingdom Women, Leaders, Professionals, and Entrepreneur Women to attract healthy happy love that leads to a lasting Christ-centered marriage. I do this by showing you how to change the trajectory of your life through renewing your mind around your mission to your mate so you can make choices that make you more attractive, bold and authentic in the space you occupy.

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The 5 C's to Successful Living!

Is this mic on?  Listen up!  Many people want to be successful at life but too many don’t want to put in the work required. That holds truth for spiritual growth, marital growth, financial wealth and business success. Talking about what you want vice doing what is necessary to get what you want or even need in some cases gets old really quickly and in order to be better, you have to do better and do more. I have seen it time and time again. Somehow many believers feel that because they made a decision to follow Christ, that magically they will be successful in their life, relationships and business. I hate to be the bearer of bad news but it doesn’t quite work that way. You have to werk werk werk werk werk!

You can’t allow the facts outweigh the truth. Ok, what are you talking about Treal? The facts maybe your #1 marriage is going through, #2your business is having a rough quarter or #3 your spiritually incapacitated etc but the TRUTH is that #1 your marriage is heal and whole through Jesus Christ and you need to own that truth and walk in it daily; #2 you are a successful business owner and all you need to continue to do is apply the principles (the word of God) and allow the holy spirit to lead you and #3 you are spiritually empowered and if you remain in God and he in you; you will bear much fruit. So that means you have to go deeper in God by spending regular and intentional time with him and in his word and oh yeah, you have to apply the word to your life among other things so that you experience success.

So you should know by now that when I speak of success, I am referring to spiritual and personal success in every sense; tangible and intangible blessings overflowing in your life, relationships and business or ministry. I told you in my last blog “3 Ways to Win At Life”that God wants us to be successful. The questions now is, so why aren’t we? Is it because you haven’t put in the work? It is because you give up to easy when you don’t see immediate results? Is it because you failed once and you think that failure is a consistent trait in your life? Maybe or Maybe not but what I want to share with you is that if you want it, you have to reach for it and here is how:

5 C's to Successful Living:

1. Community Support (online / offline or both)! You are going to need the support of others to get where you are desiring to go.  No great or successful person reached success riding solo.  If you are in need of a community to join, try ours by clicking HERE.

2. Commit to Your Own Personal Growth Work! You can’t wait for anyone to hand you a bowl of success, you have to go out there and get what belongs to you.

3. Consistent Prayer Life is a MUST! When you pray, get ready to obey. Praying not only draws you close to God but it provide you with a deeper revelation of who God is, who you are and who you are becoming. It is a gateway to your future!

4. Connect with a Purpose Partner! This is someone that can pray with and for you; who will walk hand and hand with you in life. For some of you this may be your husband, sister, best friend, coach, mentor etc. If you don’t have this person, find this person and stay connected with them. Need help finding this person, the offer still stands to join our community.  Click HERE.

5. Carefully and Intentionally Make Strategic Moves! Everything you put your hands to, do it with all diligence and excellence.

Listen, I can go on and on and give you dozens of tips but none of them will do you any good if you are not ready to put in the work to create your own success. So what will it be?

Treal Ravenel



P.S. If you are interested in our Kingdom Women membership, you can become a member by clicking here. The basic level is FREE which includes access to the KW discipleship class.

1.) Sign-up: When you click here, scroll down to the bottom of the page and complete the application.

2.) Then head over to our DMI Kingdom Women Lounge group so you can connect with genuine women who will love you like a sister or should I say a "sista".

3.) If you want to Join Kingdom Women School, purchase your books from detourmovement.org and hit "recommended" books. It is the MasterLife book set. It comes with four books for $25 to $40 or you can purchase one book at a time. We are starting with "The Disciple's Cross"

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